Our Story from Start to Beyond the Grave: WWW What Went Wrong (#52)

The morning started off with a yummy breakfast and discussion about what our plans would be for the day. Jace*—- and I decided to go see the earthquake fault and go up to the sky lift and look around. Angie and her boyfriend opted to hang out around the condo.

We went out and about exploring and taking in nature. One of our favorite pass times. The San Andreas fault was very interesting.

The split-apart rock of the Mammoth Lakes Earthquake Fault showed us of the Earth’s mighty forces. It said on a nearby post that it serves as a record of a dramatic period of geologic unrest. It is positioned deep in the forest on rolling foothills flanking the base of Mammoth Mountain. It continued to say, this incredible fissure cuts through hard volcanic rock for several hundred feet and reaches a depth of up to 60 feet.

The fracture is believed to have formed around 600 years ago during one of the recent Inyo/Mono Craters eruptions, and probably has little to do with an actual single earthquake event. While called a fault, this massive linear fissure in the Earth’s surface is more accurately defined as a fracture, as no movement between the sides is recorded. It’s little wonder that this dramatic landform exists on the outskirts of town, as the entire region is a geologically active wonderland of fumaroles, hot springs and earthquakes. It was a very uneasy and unsettling experience to be standing right on this fault. But I’m happy we got to see it together. Jace*—- as always made a few jokes to ease the tension. The one I liked best was when he broke out in song, “I feel the earth move under my feet!” More than a few people had a good laugh from that one.  

After we had looked over the fault we went on up to Mammoth Mountain to see the Wooley Mammoth Sculpture. It was very huge and impressive. We took a look inside the stores and at the lifts. The beautiful scenery around the area was very impressive.  

It was time we were on our way back to condo. That’s when things took a turn for the worse. I don’t know if his blood sugar was off, but he became very upset. He wanted to go back to Texas. When we pulled up to the condo he got out of the car and headed in, lifted up the phone and made a call to the air strip in Mammoth. They told him they had no commercial flights leaving out of Mammoth. That’s when he told me why he was unset. I didn’t have enough time for him. After about an hour of going back and forth, it was decided that we would leave and head back down the mountain to my apartment.

We packed up the car, when Jace*—- approached me and apologized, asking if we could stay. But by then, the energy was heavy and it just wasn’t a good idea to stay. So, we piled into the car and went on our way in silence. My heart was broken, I just could not figure out how everything had just gone sideways. There 0were no angry words that led up to this situation, it just happened. As I drove along the highway as quickly as I could, he suddenly took his hand and placed it on my knee. It was his way of telling me that he understood I was not doing well and that he was there for me. My love was beside me and helped me with kind words and gentle touches. Jace*—- was a very compassionate man. That gesture meant the world to me. With his strength we made it home safely. Yet my world felt like it was breaking falling apart all around me.

As we drove up to the apartment, Angie and her boyfriend got out of the car taking what belonged to them and headed to their room. It was extremely uncomfortable for them. I put on my pretend face as if all was ok and we took the rest of the things in the car into my place. Liisa my next-door neighbor saw us coming and invited us over to hang out with her and her boyfriend. It was a good distraction. We talked most of the rest of the night away and headed upstairs. All the while Jace*—- showed kindness and was loving but I could tell that something had happened that put us in a very difficult place. I wanted to wake up from this nightmare.  I literally felt as if my life was shattered into pieces. We went on to bed that night. My heart in his hands.

The next morning Jace*—- woke up in low blood sugar. Since Hawaii I’ve carried with me 5 packets of sugar just for an occasion like this. We took car of it and my love was fine once again. We took a drive up to Palos Verdes, looked over the cliffs at the ocean. The day was mostly silent, not as much talking between us as usual. Some damage has been done.

It’s the day before he leaves and I’ve got mixed feeling about him leaving. Things between us is unsettled. Neither of us wants to go there. I think because we are in fear of what it might lead to. How did this happen and how did we get here? It’s harder to let go than ever before, but I realize he is anxious to return to his home. It hurts because I love him so very much, but what means the most to me is his happiness. I just want him to know that I place his happiness very high in my life. I love this man more than I have ever loved any other.

Today is the day My Jace*—- leaves. I woke up with him by my side. I cherish these times. My wish is for us to wake up in each others arms for the rest of our lives. I went down stairs before he woke. I already was experiencing tears and fears. I didn’t want him to wake up to that. It’s a sad day and I know that it is going to be one of the hardest ones I have experienced in a long while. As I sat down stairs while he slept, thoughts went through my head of, is this the last time I will ever see you? Has the fight we had, gone beyond our repair? Do you still want to be a couple? These were a few of the questions that ran through my mind endlessly. Soon enough he came down stairs. We had breakfast, with light chatter of nonsense. This felt like two people out side of ourselves. We spent our time together. I’m afraid I wasn’t the best of company. He went up to say goodbye to Angie and her boyfriend. Now it was time to let him go. That is the way if felt. You know that saying, “If you love someone set them free. If they come back, they are yours. If not, they never will be” ran rampant through my mind. I took him to the airport where he gave me a hurried and passionate kiss goodbye. I watched him as he walked through the airport, following him with my eyes until he was out of sight. Was this the end?

Next I receive his first call.

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